Hero, Villain or Sidekick

OK so when I broke up with Roger, (yes it was me that ended it) I had this philosophy on life hit me. Have you ever seen the movie "Sky High"? Well it is about a superhero school and when you first go there you are tested to see if you are going to be a Hero or a Sidekick. And depending on what kind of power you possess you are labeled and put in your corner. I think there are three kinds of people in the world. There are Hero's, they are the one's everyone trust and loves. They hold their chin up high and take on anything that comes their way. They are not afraid of defeat only afraid of what will happen if they don't try. There are Villain's. These are the people who care about no one and will defy anything that stands in their way of their selfish desires. They don't see the world around them for sharing only for taking and possessing. And last of all we have the Sidekicks. These people are the ones who share the standards of the Hero's but don't have the strength to hold themselves up, they need the Hero by their side to help them. They are there to assist in the fight, but not to lead in the battle.

Well when I broke up with Roger it hit me, I want to marry a Hero. Someone absolutely amazing! That's great you say....the only problem is, I am a sidekick. And Hero's and Sidekick's don't get married. Hero's marry other Hero's. And Sidekick's marry other Sidekick's. To be honest I have always wanted to be a Hero. I have always wanted to prove to everyone I can do it, I can be a star! And I am not talking Hollywood star I am talking about a star in life. You know that one lady in your ward or neighborhood that you go she is positively amazing, and you aim to be just like her. I want that to be me. I want to be put together, the one people can rely on, the cool and funny person everyone can't help but love. Yet when it all boils down to why I am not living my life as a hero the base of it is fear. What if I try to be a hero and I fail, fall flat on my face? I don't want to disappoint anyone any more, especially myself.

Yet I am tired of not living up to my true potential. But today I found a talk by President Uchtdorf that has really helped me.

"You can do this! You are part of a special generation. You were prepared and preserved to live at this important time in the existence of our beautiful planet earth. You have a celestial pedigree and therefore have all the necessary talents to make your life an eternal success story.

The Lord has blessed you with a testimony of the truth. You have felt His influence and witnessed His power. And if you continue to seek Him, He will continue to grant you sacred experiences. With these and other spiritual gifts, you will be able not only change your own life for the better but also to bless your homes, wards or branches, communities, cities, states and nations with your goodness."

You know what this says....I am already a Hero. I am already a Hero because I was BORN a Hero! I have all the necessary talents (or powers) to make my life an eternal success story! I don't need to go looking for kryptonite, I am already equipped with superhero powers! I can change myself and also the world for the better. I can do this, I can reach my potential. All I need to do is continue to place my trust in the Lord and live my life as He did and with His help I can become the Hero I have always wanted to be.

I am a big girl and big girls don't cry

New year, a new start right? Right. OK here goes. I am going to grow up, I can't be relying on everyone for everything any more. I can't always be looking for someone to help pick up the pieces of my life. I am going to do this all on my own. I NEED to do this all on my own. I need to show myself that I can make it by myself. So here I go, a new semester of school started today and I don't have my best friend by my side. We have not a single class together, it has been five semesters since that has happened. Going to school today was like taking me back to my first year in 2004, I thought I was going to be sick. Every time I walked into a new class this huge wave of panic washed over me. But I told myself I was going to be OK, and I was. I did OK. No I didn't talk to anyone because that would have been completely out of my comfort zone for the moment, but I am hoping to get back to my crazy self soon. I have made a goal to go to attend class every day and do my homework on time. I know you are shaking your head saying "Alissa, really?" But it's true, I am going to try my hardest this semester. I need to show myself that I am a strong enough person to do this, because if I can get through a semester of college with out my best friend and having a panic attack every five minutes, I can get over Roger. Like I said before I am a big girl now and big girl's don't cry.

Today

Today I want you in my arms.
Today I need you to tell me you actually loved me.
Today you and me make sense.
Today everything reminds me of you.
Today I don't want to cry.
Today I am sorry for all the pain I caused.
Today I dont' want us to be over.
Today the pain of saying goodbye is as fresh as the day I said it.
Today I can't think of anyone else but you.
Today I wonder how to make this work.
Today will turn into tomorrow and what will I have then? A bunch of empty wishes, broken promises, fallen tears, sleepless nights, wasted days.....but today I love you and you are worth the pain.

Here is a pic....

This is me and Roger the night we went to see New Moon :) He is doing thumbs up! Haha not sure why :) We have so much fun together, he is great!

Alissa is no longer listed as single

So it's official....I have a boyfriend. (Pause for the open mouths to close, for the screams to stop and the "I can't believe it" to sink in) Well you may have read the post cooking at work and read that I had gone out on a date with a certain man named Roger. Well we have been dating for almost a month and this past week decided to just date each other, be exclusive I guess.

Well this is my first real relationship, I know kinda hard to believe, but it is. And I am a little out of sorts with it. I was not planning on getting a boyfriend or a relationship at all. I was not out looking (I mean I was going on dates but nothing crazy) and then Roger just showed up. Haha literally he just showed up at work and asked me out! I am a nervous wreck when I see him, but then I am completely relaxed...is this normal? I have to admit this is so new to me that I have been asking for advice at every corner, but I also know that I need to do this my own way.

We are both really nervous I think so things are going slow...which to be honest bugged me at first but now I am totally OK with :) I am not in a hurry, Jackie said to enjoy these first few months of dating because they are the best and I plan on making them just that!

Lunch Committee

Here are some of the committee members for Lunch. I LOVE this bunch...they are amazing!!

Cooking at work

Well I was invited over to Rogers house for dinner and did not want to show up empty handed, as any guest knows you don't. So I decided I wanted to make dessert. One little problem...I am working. Well no fear I can make something, I mean come on I work in a grocery store right! OK what to make....I have no stove, oven, blender, freezer....um the options are getting pretty low. Well Danielle who has her cook book with her (have no idea why) pulls out a recipe for Oreo truffles. All you need is a package of Oreo's, cream cheese, and almond bark. Pretty simple. You crush the Oreo's combine them with the cream cheese, roll into balls and dip in the almond bark and refrigerate.

It took about three hours from start to finish, which is due to the fact that I had to stop and come back when we were slow. So I think if you were to do this at home it would be a lot faster! They turned out great!! I have never had them and I was a little nervous they were not going to taste good, but they were amazing! Thanks everyone at work for helping out!

Dinner was great, he didn't have time to cook because he got off work late so we just ordered pizza and watched a movie. It was a fun night, I really liked the part where he held my hand...that was pretty good :)